wakey wakey

the morning after
reminds me of first time
I held amanda's hand
walking silently down
the halls of my middle school

During lunch we'd conveyed messages
through giggling girls
excited to the point of bursting by
the whispered phrases of
overcharged pubescent hormones.

But somehow I'd convinced this
brown eyed slender girl
that holding my hand was a good thing
that it was worth the effort
And I reveled in the prize.

walking down that hall
next to the lines of
half-empty yellow lockers
I was crushed by the possibilities
without a clue what to say, or do

but that's the best moment
all unrealized potential, expectation
exaultation not chained by
mistakes, omissions, and errors to come
lifted by the afterglow of achievement

Amanda and I "broke up" a few weeks later
I don't remember why,
but it doesn't really matter
we weren't married forever
but I am now